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Trying
to keep our whirlwind lives in some kind of order is
an exhausting task, never mind trying to find time
to do the things we love to do. In today's busy
world, we work, take care of the kids, husband,
house, elderly parents and even our pets.
Oftentimes, we don't have time to enjoy our own
lives. Having fun or mental relaxation isn't
selfish, it helps us rejuvenate and replenish our
Self so we can handle the daily chores that need to
be done.
Below are some tips to help
balance out our lives:
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Prioritize
We often find ourselves getting up early in the
morning or staying up late to accomplish the
things we feel we "need" to do. Ask yourself if
this chore really needs to be done now or if it
is something that can be put on hold. If you
have three things going at once at work, speak
with your manager and ask which function is a
priority and start with that one. When we feel
we are overwhelmed with responsibility, it is
hard to get a start on any task. Once we have
one handled, it is easier to see how the others
will fall into place.
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Delegate, Delegate, Delegate
Women have a hard time asking for help. We feel
if we hand over chores, they will not get done
as we would like them to. To get more balance in
our lives we need to give up some control. It
can be as simple as asking our kids to sort the
laundry, setting the table for breakfast for the
next morning or making their own lunch. Handing
over responsibility can make other household
members feel important and will help them grow
into responsible adults.
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Track where your time goes
Many times I give clients an assignment of
keeping a Time Chart. This is a chart that
tracks exactly where you spend your time. Seeing
it on paper is often an eye-opener that allows
us to see that we spend much of our time doing
things that we don't enjoy doing. Make a chart
with Sunday through Saturday at the top. On the
left-hand side write down all of the daily
things you do. Don't forget to include sleep and
work, adding in the commute time. Make sure the
time adds up to 24 hours. See if you can find
time wasters, such as watching TV or sorting
through clutter to find things.
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Consolidate tasks
Now that you have seen exactly where your time
goes, see if there are any areas that can be
combined. For example, while waiting at the
doctor's office you can write out some bills. If
you are making dinner, make double the amount
and freeze some for a future meal. While on the
phone, get some ironing or cleaning done. There
are many areas in our lives in which we can
create more space.
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Conspire with a friend
Find a friend facing similar challenges. Invite
your friend's kids to stay with you one Saturday
for a few hours while your friend runs errands
or just takes some well-deserved time for
herself. Ask for the favor one Saturday in
return. This can also work with car-pooling.
Offer to exchange rides with another school or
teammate. This works well for both parties and
it helps create some space in your busy
schedule.
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Learn to say "no" / Setting Boundaries
Saying "no" isn't an easy thing for most women
to do. We are taught at an early age to be
pleasers. Because "no" is hard for most of us to
say, we find ourselves doing things we truly
don't want to be doing: Having lunch with an old
co-worker because we can't put them off any
longer, going to a party where we don't really
like the people hosting it or joining a
committee that we don't have a passion for.
Instead of making excuses, tell people that you
are taking more time for yourself and your
family. You will probably be the envy of many
women and may give them the courage to say "no"
also!
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Pencil some fun into your schedule
Promise yourself that you will do one fun thing
for yourself or with your family every week.
Things come up and we often break promises to
ourselves and to others. Make time in your
schedule and unless the house is burning down,
keep the date you made for fun and relaxation.
When you are relaxed and have balance in your
life, your family will notice the difference in
you. You will be more present for them and won't
be stressed out and frustrated.
Contact Karen Regan at 978-448-2353 or
info@coachforhappiness.com |
